작성일 : 18-07-16 12:40
[현대불교] 마음의 짐 덜고, 삶의 희망 찾았어요
 글쓴이 : 불교상담개발원 (121.♡.208.68)
조회 : 2,690  
   http://www.hyunbulnews.com/news/articleView.html?idxno=296780 [515]
[특별기고] 자살예방 템플스테이를 다녀와서


자살 위험에 노출된 시민들의 아픈 마음을 어루만지는 힐링 체험이 사찰에서 열려 눈길을 끈다. 불교계 유일의 전문상담기관 불교상담개발원(원장 가섭)이 7월 7~8일 서울시와 함께 서울 금선사에서 자살예방 템플스테이를 개최한 것이다. 마음 속의 아픈 상처를 녹인 이날 템플스테이에 참여한 참가자들의 후기를 전한다. <편집자 주>


“마음 한구석 힘든 부분 떨쳐”

가족 중 누군가를 잃는다는 것은 참으로 힘든 일입니다. 7월 7일 진행된 마음 돌아보기 어루만지기 템플스테이에서 저는 새로운 삶의 희망을 얻게 됐습니다.

사실 이번 템플스테이 참가는 2017년에 이은 두 번째입니다. 이번에는 북한산 공원의 아름다운 자연환경과 맑은 물소리가 처음 방문하는 저를 반기는 듯했습니다.

저는 저 스스로가 아주 큰 스트레스를 받고 있는 사실을 알아서 좋았고, 스트레스를 해소하는 방법을 알려줘서 더 좋았습니다.

그 무엇보다 저는 108배를 통해 힘들었던 심신에 집중하면서 나쁜 감정들을 해소하게 되었습니다. 제 삶의 새 출발을 위한 자신감을 얻었으며, 마음 한 구석에 힘들었던 부분을 누구에게도 이야기 하지 못한 것을 집단상담을 통해 편안함을 느꼈습니다.

특히, 소감 나누기 시간에 한 여성 참가자 분께서 자신의 희망모습이 아닌 저의 희망모습을 지점토로 만들어 주셨습니다. 그분이 앞으로는 항상 웃는 얼굴로 아내와 행복하게 잘 지내라는 것을 재차 말씀해 주셔서 너무 큰 감동을 받았습니다.

바쁜 일상생활 속에서 나를 잊고 웅크리고 살았습니다. 이번 기회는 불쌍한 나를 돌아보고 위로해 주고 사랑해 주는 시간이 되었습니다. 템플스테이를 통해 너무 행복했으며, 아울러 긍정의 마인드를 가질 수 있게 도와주신 많은 분들에게 감사드립니다. 자살자 유가족 윤이석 씨(가명)



“항상 내 고통만 생각했는데…”

참가할지 말지를 7월 7일 토요일 아침까지도 많이 망설였습니다. 템플스테이에 용기 내어 참가하게 되어 유익한 시간을 보냈다고 생각합니다. 특히 집단 프로그램에서 다른 사람들의 아픔도 나누게 되었습니다.

저는 항상 나의 고통만을 생각하면서 아파했습니다. 나는 왜 이렇게 사는 것일까, 나는 왜 이렇게 힘들까라고 고민했습니다. 억울하기도 했고, 답답하기만 했습니다. 삶의 끈을 놓아버릴까 고민했던 시간도 많았습니다.

이번에 사찰에서 조용한 가운데 다른 사람들의 사연을 들어보니 모두가 힘들게 사는 것을 여실히 느꼈습니다. 그리고 조금이나마 힘이 있을 때 다른 사람 마음도 어루만질 수 있는 여유를, 삶의 여백을 가져야 되겠다는 생각을 하였습니다.

프로그램 중 숲속 명상에서 마음의 여유 느끼기, 거울 바라보기, 숲속의 바람소리, 새소리 계곡물 소리 등이 좋았습니다.

자연의 소리가 저를 자연인으로 만들어주는 느낌을 받아 너무 좋았습니다. 일상생활에서 지친 가운데 우리도 하나의 생명이구나, 이 생명을 소중히 생각하고 힘차게 살아야 겠구나라고 생각했습니다. 이런 마음가짐도 다시 사회로 돌아가면 금방 지치겠지요. 하지만 지금 있는 이런 상쾌한 마음가짐을 다시 떠올리며 힘을 내야 겠습니다. 다음 번에도 이러한 기회가 주어졌으면 합니다. 함께 해주신 인연에 감사드립니다.

육인숙 씨(가명)

출처 : 현대불교신문(http://www.hyunbulnews.com)

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